I rushed down onto the platform to catch my train and smiled upon noticing two mormon missionaries squirm as I entered the car. It's not like I was wearing anything particularly revealing: a blue, striped tank top under a light sweater, and a pair of blue short shorts that ended halfway down my thighs - okay, maybe that was it. I brushed it off without a second thought, though I did get a kick out of making them slightly uncomfortable.
Combing my fingers through my hair hair, I noticed that I caught the attention of a few other passengers who stared as if they've never seen a man wear short shorts in the spring. Maybe they never have. You're welcome. As I stared back at the others, a young woman who sat to my left looked up at me and said, "Don't worry about it, honey. I think you look very cute!" "Oh. I work it." is all I managed to get out without sounding overtly cocky.
After coming to our first stop a good amount of people, including the young woman, get off, opening up seats for myself and the missionaries. I saw them trying to figure out which seat I would take, so as to avoid the general area, but I just stood there in feigned oblivion. During the time in which they were calculating my every non-move most of the seats became occupied, leaving the ones next to where I stood. They reluctantly sat down and, completely bored yet annoyed with the situation, I decided to add to their discomfort and prop my gay ol' self in the free seat next to them.
As always the trains are delayed which, for the first time, actually made me smile even harder on the inside as the two next to me began sweating bullets. Honestly, I don't understand how people can be so blatantly homophobic and thoroughly misinformed. What did they expect me to do? It's not like I was planning on relentlessly flirting with them, convert their children, and destroy the sanctity of marriage. No, my "gay agenda" is far more fabulous.
The one next to me looked my way and started surveying my outfit but then fixed his eyes on my wristband. He smiled, which I didn't expect, looked up at me and said, "Wow, I-I just have to say that I'm sorry, and... yeah, you're absolutely right." I just stared back at him confused and caught completely off guard. "You're bracelet," he explains "It says 'thou shalt not judge' and, well, yeah. No, I'm so sorry."
"Oh. Thanks?" I stammered as we came to another stop upon which they rose from their seats, exited the car, and caught their transfer. I sunk into my seat, trying to absorb that interaction, and realized I'd missed my transfer as the subway jetted out of the station.